By: Noelle Wong
Many single people ask what the best flirting technique is. The best technique, in my opinion, is not a crude act that involves a man whistling to a woman on the street, nor a woman dropping a pile
Many single people ask what the best flirting technique is. The best technique, in my opinion, is not a crude act that involves a man whistling to a woman on the street, nor a woman dropping a pile of books or papers in front of a man she has a crush on. Flirting is the art of getting the attention of someone who you are interested in for potential romance. The best way is to be elegant and simple, yet direct enough to attract someone to approach you, or have someone to be opened enough to be approached. Of course, it can also be fun.
There are three steps to flirting. The first step is preparing yourself for it through dressing and grooming. Too often, single women “give up” on looking great all the time when they are single. Coco Chanel put it this way, “I don't understand how a woman can leave the house without fixing herself up a little - if only out of politeness. And then, you never know, maybe that's the day she has a date with destiny. And it's best to be as pretty as possible for destiny.” Since you’ll never know when you’ll meet the man of your dreams, you definitely don’t want to miss the opportunity of looking pretty when he comes. Honestly, do you really want to get anyone’s attention, when you do not look and feel gorgeous?
So, wear clothing that makes you feel sexy. Now, there is a fine line between being elegantly sexy, and over exposing yourself. Think tasteful, rather than dramatically boastful. You should look like you have put in good effort, but not trying too hard. Some examples:
a dash of bright colour, rather than head to toe bright colour;
subtle make up that bring out your natural beauty, not scary vampy colours all over the face;
a dress or skirt that molds your body smoothly, rather than something that looks as if it’s painted on your skin.
Throw out old, grubby clothes that do not serve you. Afterall, you do want to make room for new romance in your life. Start by letting go of clothes that do not make you look and feel amazing.
Get a haircut if your hair is not neat and fresh looking. Your image should radiate sexy, healthy femininity.
Second, don’t hide in your home in your free time! If you want to attract romance into your life, you must be where people are. It can be participating in a speed dating event, singles’ tours, or joining a sport or hobby that interest you. Whether it is a place where people are deliberately looking for romance or not, the key point is to get yourself out where potential candidates are. Take action in either one of these ways: go to where the people are, or attract people to you by organizing an event yourself. Throw a singles’ party – be creative.
Third, make eye contact and smile! The point to remember is be open to communication. This is the hard part. Some women run away after making eye contact, before any real communication takes place. Stay right where you are. If you have done your dressing and grooming properly, this is not the time to worry about how you look. By this stage, you should be feeling sexy and gorgeous with your looks. Focus on your behaviour and listening skills, and find out whether this is your potential Romeo. Let him approach you, and let him speak first. Talk, but don’t blab non-stop – it’s a turnoff. Let him lead by impressing you with who he is. You are there to listen and observe, and inviting him to let you know who he is by your stance, gestures and eye contact. Keep the conversation flowing by listening to him with interest, and talking a little.
At the end of the conversation, if you feel you want to see him again, and if you can sense that he wants the same, let him ask you out. If he doesn’t initiate by asking you out, don’t ask him out directly. Invite him to ask you out instead. Say something like: I wish guys like you would ask me out. Or: I have a movie I want to see for a while, but I need to find someone who is interested to see it with me. Or just give him your phone number, and let him take initiative. Encourage him to ask you out, do not ask him out yourself. If he gives you his number, do not call him. Say that you are much more comfortable being asked out, rather than being the initiator. Remember, being initiative is male.
So flirting is fun, and anyone who can think can do this. Let me repeat the 3 steps to attract a potential prince into your life:
1. Dress and groom tastefully all the time, so that you will feel pretty and sensuous, ready to meet your potential man.
2. Be where people are, rather than cooping up at home.
3. Flirt by smiling and making eye contact; then letting him to initiate the rest.
Every woman deserves to be romanced. Just as anything else in life that is worthwhile takes effort, the same with attracting a relationship. So do your part daily to attract the romance that you want in your life.
Noelle Wong is a Personal Image Consultant, and is the founder of iN-IMAGE! Inc. Her mission is to see and unveil beauty in people. She is trained in the areas of image, business and relationships. She holds a certificate in Image Consulting from George Brown College, a business degree from the Richard Ivey School of Business, University of Western Ontario, and certificate of Colour analysis from International Image Institute, from which she also received complete image consulting training.
Noelle has a lifelong interest in what makes relationships work. She is a graduate of Lifestream Basic, and has studied the works of Dr. Patricia Allen, as well as Barbara and Allan Pease, who are relationship specialists. From her studies and experiences, she fully understands that personal image can make or break your chances of attracting and maintaining an intimate relationship.
